Children Moving Out? Follow These Tips
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August 2018
Changing your location and embracing a new home environment can be challenging both physically and emotionally – especially for children and teenagers. Delicate emotions can run high as beloved former bedrooms are stripped of toys, gadgets and personalised wall art.
Excited yet anxious teenagers can become overwhelmed as they stare at the chaos around them. They’re supposed to be deciding what to take to their new University accommodation and what they should leave. And then there’s the parents – trying their best to reassure their teenager that they’re going to have to start making some decisions about their pile of possessions before they run out of time! It can be an overwhelming process. It can be happy, it can be sad, it can be stressful – and it can be all of the above all at the same time.
Your children may be moving out of home for a number of reasons - changing location for a fresh start, a new job, attending university in a different city or just for a chance to spread their wings. Most people move out of the family home and set up their own place during their late teens to late 20s, at both at the approval or dismay of their parents. Desire for independence, better job prospects or the urge to live closer to a new partner – all of these factors can encourage a young person to leave the nest, even if it’s not what their parents want for them.
And the parents, while having a right to give their input on their child’s decision, need to communicate in a way that doesn’t make the child feel pushed to stay, or guilty about their choices. It is a trying time for all involved.
Moving to a new location needs to be handled by parents with balance, calmness and pragmatic input. The ages of the children involved can affect the emotional reaction to moving, but equally the way in which a child/teenager reacts can be massively influenced by the behaviour of the adults in their life.
With much to consider on an emotional level, a parent’s energy needs to be focused in the right direction - otherwise unnecessary stress and anxiety can affect the moving process. How does a parent ensure the moving process remains constructive and balanced, without unknowingly adding stress or negativity into the mix? What support can they give to their child who is about to move to a new place?
Advice for the Child Who is Emotional About Moving Out:
- Remind: explain to them that “home is where the heart is” – their new bedroom will be just as special, personal and exciting as the one they’re leaving. It’s a new start and a fresh canvas to work with
- Reassure: explain to them that if things go wrong they will always be welcome to come back home.
- Relate: give them an example of when you first moved out of home and how you felt, and how the experience worked out for you.
Advice for Teenagers Who are Moving Out and Don’t Want Your Advice:
- Structure your advice: yes, ask the important questions, but don’t fire them in a way that makes your child feel inadequate. “Are you ready to live independently?”, “Do you make enough money to support yourself?”, “Are you moving out for the right reasons?”. All of these are important questions for your child to consider. Structured advice will lead to structured behaviour.
- Communicate concerns: avoid misunderstandings, arguments and resentment by talking openly and respectfully about what’s worrying you as a parent. Listen to your child and accept their reasoning.
- Be available, emotionally and physically: remind your child that you need them to keep in touch – angle it from a perspective of “I’ll miss you I need a call every week, at least” rather than “this is going to be a disaster, I know it – I’ll need peace of mind to know you’re alive. Call me every day”.
So now you’ve invested time and energy into the important, emotional factors surrounding your child and the move – how do you even begin to navigate the actual moving process itself? The main thing you’ll need to organise is how you will help them pack, transport and unload.
This is where the team at John Ryan Removals can help! Melbourne-based, but with the ability to transport almost anywhere, John Ryan Removals can provide the following removalist services:
- Safe, secure packing using a range of specific cartons to ensure your belongings are totally protected during transit.
- Highly-skilled packers and movers will ensure that the process of packing and relocating is done with efficiency and attention to detail.
- Fully-equipped vehicles to suit all types of furniture.
With over four decades of experience as the top removalist service in Melbourne, John Ryan Removals are experts in interstate and international house removals.